🎄A seasonal message from Oli. Make this Christmas count!

I’m a firm believer that you only get one shot at life and that you should spend it trying at least to live the best one you can.

Christmas Stout! Cheers to making it count.

Don’t get me wrong. I get that when it comes to life everyone is dealt a different card. Some are lucky enough to be dealt the card of great privilege, some are dealt a card of hardship. Life can be as cruel as it can be kind. Many of us learn from a young age that we can’t all go on to be multi millionaire entrepreneurs, scientists or brain surgeons. Not all of us have the talent to write hit music or star in Hollywood blockbusters. Each card that is dealt to each person comes with its own challenges, it’s own limitations but equally its own opportunity.

For me I’d like to think I’ve been dealt a pretty lucky card in life. Growing up I had a mum and a dad active in my life, we had everything we needed, we were loved and looked after, supported where we needed support and were pushed when we needed pushing. Don’t get me wrong, like most my childhood didn’t come without its challenges but it gave me a great platform to grow up and grow into adulthood.

As I’ve progressed through my adult life I’ve come to realise as much as there is a lot of light in the world there are some a lot of darkness too. I’ve been through some incredibly difficult moments and feel like at times I’ve been pushed to the absolute edge of my mental capacity. In equal measure I’ve been lucky enough to experience some of the great thrills in life too. I’d like to think I’ve taken that lucky card I was dealt in life and I’ve done my best to make the most of it. Without wanting to get into cheeseville with this post I’ve graduated university, I’ve started and continued in a great career, travelled all over the world, I’ve met and married the love of my life, we’ve got the most perfect little boy, a wonderful home and 2 lovely (if not a times challenging!) dogs.

In short it’s fair to say that despite life's challenges I’m a lucky man and I enjoy reminding myself of that every day, soaking up as much of it as I can.

So why then did I find myself hurting towards the end of 2022 jaded and frankly struggling? How can you be questioning your life and the direction it is taking when you have absolutely everything you can have ever wanted from it? You’re so lucky and so appreciative of what you have yet it feels like there is something missing?

It took me a while to understand what the hell was wrong with me until I realised it was because I’m in a position where I have the power (and the privilege) not to simply accept my fate but to shape my future, build on what I’ve got and (try to) be a better person for it. I have a need for adventure and a curiosity that in every year of my life up until that point I feel like I’d managed to satisfy. That was until 2022 when I realised the year simply, passed me by.

It really is true what they say isn’t it – the older you get the quicker time goes? After all of the struggles, anxiety and stress that we all felt in the couple of years before it 2022 ended up being a case of blink and you missed it for me with nothing of note to report other than I was another year older but absolutely no more the wiser! Obviously I was able to share some great time with my family and for that I will always be grateful but I didn’t feel like I made the most of it, for the first time in my life I felt like I hadn’t made important memories, hadn’t moved forward enough and hadn’t achieved nearly enough. It was a year that just ‘happened’.

With my annual end of year reflection I decided that what had gone had gone, there was nothing I could do about that but equally I couldn’t let that happen again. I couldn’t allow my life to fall into a that awful cycle of simply ‘existing’. I could feel that cycle taking hold but couldn’t bare the thought of that happening to me, to us. As I steamroller towards 40 I feel like I’ve well and truly hit a crossroads in life. I’ve achieved so much and done all the things you’re ‘supposed to do’, so what next? Continue straight and accept that this is life now? It’s not bad a bad life at all, like I’ve said I have everything I could have ever wanted and at least I know my place and have a good idea of what is to come.

But what if I turn off the road slightly just to see where it takes me? I really felt like 2023 needed to be different. Curiosity got the better of me and with that I guess a bit of off roading seemed like a good way forward.

On New Years Eve last year Azzie and I toasted to 2023, to embarking on a new adventure to launch a tiny tiny little enterprise from our garage. We had no name, we had no equipment, no licences, no product. We had no idea if it would ever get off the ground but we were excited to see where this new adventure could take us.

As the year progressed so did each stage of the adventure. We built walls, we learnt new skills, we got licences, we sourced new equipment. We were stressed but we were excited. It felt like we were building something. We were alive again.

Equally as the year progressed the realities of trying to balance starting a new brewery business whilst also working full time (both of us!) and raising, spending time with and making memories with a 6 year old began to bite. This isn’t an easy rodeo! If it were plenty would be doing it I suppose.

Now to be brutally honest, there have been moments where I have questioned whether it is actually worth it. We’ve invested so much into this but on reflection is it really worth all the time and energy that you could be putting into spending time with your friends and family? You go into it thinking ‘ahhh it be reet’ but honestly it just isn’t that simple. There have already been several Saturday nights I’ve been clearing down having been brewing all day, desperate to get done and get back to the family but with so much more to do. Gahh that can be frustrating and it’s tiring.

But as I look back on what has been another year that has gone in the blink of an eye I can sit happy and contented that although it hasn’t gone any slower than last year I have absolutely made the most of the time, achieved a great deal and most importantly given myself a new energy to make memories. I feel in an infinitely better place now than I did this time last year. I often say these posts are as much of a therapy session for me as they are something to read for you but I can honestly say that I think Borderlines Brewing has been that too. It has been a wonderful escape from the car crash of the real world, my little attempt to take back control when I felt like I was loosing it. It may be something very small to most people, it kind of is to me, but it has also meant so much.

So what have I got to moan about now then? So far so good right? It’s been a GREAT year and I’m only 37, so got bag loads of time to see where this could all lead. Exciting times.

37 years old. Just remember that.

I’ve lost two close friends this year. Fair to say THAT’s been shit. I’m absolutely not old enough to be loosing even one let alone two friends in a year. It’s been absolutely heart breaking. If ever I needed a reality check this was it. It’s had much more of a profound effect on me than the brewery ever could. I’ve had people give me the bullshit spiel of ‘well, when it’s your time it’s your time’. How dare they. Whilst I try to be philosophical about life I’m not a religious or spiritual person and I will absolutely not apologise for calling them out on such drivel. I obviously know that we will all ‘pass on’, ‘move on to the next life’, call it what you will, at some point but these people absolutely did not deserve to have their lives cut short in the way that they have been. Their families did not deserve the pain and heartache of loosing someone so close to them so soon and so unexpectedly. Their friends, a club I’m humbled and honoured to be in, did not deserve to be loosing people close to them in the way they have either.

There really isn’t much you can take from situations like that. I try to be an optimistic and positive person but these losses have frankly rocked me to my core. It’s just not right and it makes you realise that no life is certain, not even your own. That being said, if there is anything, anything at all I can totally and utterly selfishly take from their passing I would have to say it is that everything I said at the beginning of this post is more poignant now than at any point in my life so far. Simply put, life is short - live it well.

As we continue our reflections on the year gone by but also start to think about the year ahead for me and my family that has got to mean continue to follow your passions, make the most of every day and prioritise making as many memories as you can along the way.

I’m not a great believer in new years resolutions but if you are and are stuck for one this year maybe make it this: No matter how sure you are of your future sometimes you have absolutely no control over it. It can change in the blink of an eye. So take control of what you can, make memories, push your boundaries, be unapologetically yourself, have fun, have no regrets. Most of all, live.

If 2023 has taught me anything it is that this is more important than ever.

So what about Christmas then? This is after all meant to be a reflective but jolly post. Well, here we go.

First things first. Forget all the corporate bollocks around Christmas. It is absolutely not about how many gifts you can buy, how big the tree is, how many varieties of desserts you can get your hands on or the flashy starter your going to cook on Christmas Day. Forget about the gift for your friends, friends kids that you feel you have to buy because they bought your kids one. Absolutely please do not feel the need to boast on social media about what that sodding Elf on the Shelf has been doing or about how packed with goodies the kids Christmas Eve boxes are (I mean when did that EVER become a ‘thing’ and seriously, what will they think of next!). I really don’t need to see it friends. Don’t even get me started on the ‘Sales’.

The pressure of the festive season, if you let it, can become utterly unbearable.

However hard to avoid, Christmas shouldn’t be about any of that. For those so very lucky enough to be able to spend it with family and friends take a moment to step back, take a deep breath and breathe it all in. Enjoy the quality time, making special memories with the people that are the most important in your lives. Allow yourself the time in your busy lives to step back for just a couple of days to forget about the day to day. If you ditch the frantic festive corporate Christmas and just do that I guarantee - you will not regret it.

With that all that is left to say is Merry Christmas and truly thanks so much for all of your support this year.

Oli